Thursday, March 29, 2007

Love

Has anyone ever told you people that you ROCK?? Well, you do. Thank you for your overwhelming support and loving thoughts. I felt--still feel--that I'm wrapped in a giant warm hug. Any loneliness that I was feeling has been banished. I have often read Dotee's description of her heart expanding. That is how it feels. It is filled with love and bursting at the seams. Thank you, each and every one, for your words and your positive thoughts. They really do matter. They really do make a difference.

I have some ideas kicking around in my head. I've bought a microphone and I'm thinking of mixing my own cd. I spent last night playing with a karaoke thing on the computer. I thought of you guys so often as I was singing..I sang you love songs. :) Nick has an excellent mixer on this computer and he has shown me how to use it. It's taking me a while to understand it, though. It's sort of like making a collage with music. Adding beats here, strings there. At the very least, I would love to record one song just to play for you, because that is an integral part of who I am and the art I have to share. I have dreamed of making a recording since I was a child. Now I am thinking, "Why not?" What's stopping me? Maybe I'll even sell them on Etsy. hehe

I am also thinking big thoughts of travel. I always think of myself as the hub here. I reside in the center (home) while my family comes and goes. Nick and Michael went to Mexico. They got back and Tim left for California. Now Nick is on his way to New York. I like being the constant. They come and go, knowing that there is one who remains and takes care of the necessary things. But when everyone gets back...I'm outta here. LOL This hub is flying off and going on its own excursion. I plan to take the SoulCollage® facilitator course and, as of right now, it is only taught on the West Coast.

I wrote an article about SoulCollage® yesterday and submitted it to Associated Content. It's the first thing I've written in a while and it felt good. It felt good to write about something that I'm excited about.

I think you are all right about the door closing. That job was more about my ego than anything anyway. It certainly didn't feed my family. It paid enough to make me feel that I was contributing, that I could freely spend some cash without feeling beholden (that's a word, right?) to Tim, and it was actually the fruition of a dream and it made me feel good to say that I was copy editor of a magazine...particularly an Art magazine. It was fun while it lasted. It really was. But I'm over it. I was using the money from editing to rationalize not writing so now I am writing again, but I am writing about things that I feel passionate about. That is my choice that I am making.

I am making a conscious effort to stop letting my ego dictate my life. Ego stops us from doing so many things because we might fail and then it (the ego) would look bad. Well, that's the ego's problem. I'm not worrying about failure any more. I'm not worrying about looking funny to others, "who does she think she is anyway?" Who do I think I am? I think I am a vessel that houses an amazing force. The same force that moves the earth and the sun, the same force that causes the daffodils to spring up out of the cold, hard ground. The same force that flows through people from all over the world causing them to pour out their hearts in positive love for someone who was feeling blue.

It's an amazing thing. My cup is full and running over.

15 comments:

Kitty Couture said...

((((Lisa)))) Thank you for sharing your joys with us. I most needed a heart-lifting post. Thank you, my friend.

Melissa said...

Yup...I am writing a similar style of post right now...btw did you notice. I am writing at AC now? It is in my sidebar...I will email you in a few minutes.

Pam Aries said...

I as so glad to hear you are feeling better about things! YOU should...you are an awesome artist! see how things change when you think good thoughts! hee hee1 love ya !

PennyBlue said...

Stick with your passion! Sounds like you are having a glorius day!! Thanks for sharing.

mrsnesbitt said...

One of the many good things about blogging is we read of somebody on the otherside of the world feeling just the same as we do, and it makes the whole life thing manageable and enjoyable.

So good to know you are much better.
Hugs from afar, Dxx

gma said...

I saw Wayne Dyer @ a Unity Church ...he spoke of ego and did a demo which I thought was unforgettable.
B=Birth
EGO (what we have here on earth)
D=Death
or
B-EGO-D(Be God)
the force that pushes up the daffidols.

Lisa Oceandreamer Swifka said...

Oh Lisa this was an incredible post - an outstanding testament to the most amazing person I already knew you were. I think we're all full of possibilities if we just side step the ego and that fear of failure and rejection. All three of them are blockades we put in front of ourselves. You would be a fantastic facilitator for Soul Collage and I truly hope you do pursue that. West Coast eh??? I know there are some right here in CA!
PLEASE record your singing..I want so much to hear it - that kind of artistic talent should be shared too!! Can't wait!
Love you!!
XOXOXO

Janet said...

I would love to hear a recording by you. Voices are such personal parts of us and until we hear that voice the words are just plain black and white. A voice puts color into them and brings them alive.
What part of the West Coast are you going to be visiting? Maybe there can be a meeting of the West Coast bloggers!!
Ego is a huge factor in keeping people from their life's dreams. I love your attitude about it and your description of being the vessel for life's force. Go out there and do your thing!!

Tinker said...

You GO GIRL!! You rock! Oh wow! What a great post, Lisa - and you know what? It's one I needed personally to read right now - thank you for sharing your journey - and I hope you're travelling onto the journey of your dreams, wherever they may take you...
p.s. I can't wait to hear you sing to us, btw!

Izabella Blue said...

I love coming to visit, you are always such an inspiration~ I would ab~soul~utely love to hear your recording!

xo ~Bella

Gill said...

Wow, so glad you are feeling better. It sucks getting down like that.
The only getting down you should be doing is on the dance floor with that karaoke machine!!!!
xoxo

MAHIMA said...

i had an old old article about soul collage that i had printed out. just found it yesterday. i plan to get started making some today...

Anonymous said...

Good for you Lisa. We should all take note of this post. Record that song or cd. Go for the gold. Love Hugs and Blessing

J C said...

UGOGIRL! You are on a life adventure, and you are going to get somewhere! Good luck, and we Glitter Sis's will be right there with you!

homespun living said...

So glad things are looking better. And how exciting~a trip!
Debbie